Wednesday, January 17, 2007

thanks a lot, tweakers

I'm a big fan of pseudoephedrine. Between my allergies in Spring and Summer, and colds in Fall and Winter, I go through a lot of it. I fully expect that one of these days the DEA will show up on my doorstep wanting to know why I use so much of it. How would the DEA know how much pseudoephedrine I use? Glad you asked.

It turns out that pseudoephedrine is one of the ingredients you need to make methamphetamine. Pharmacies and grocery stores had so much trouble with people shoplifting it (presumably so they could go home and cook it) that over time they've made it more and more difficult to get. They put it behind the counter at the pharmacy so you had to ask the pharmacist for it. Then they made it so you could only buy one item per day - I found this out the hard way when the whole family had a cold, and I tried to buy children's Sudafed for Link and grown-up Sudafed for me. Sorry, they said, only one item per day. (I have no idea if it's even possible to make meth out of liquid psuedoephedrine. I suppose it must be.) Now when you want to buy it, you not only have to ask the pharmacist for it, they have to enter all your personal information including your driver's license number in a written log, then log onto an online system and get a confirmation number for the transaction, before they can sell the stuff. This is particularly annoying, because now I not only have to wait in line and buy it during pharmacy hours (which, needless to say, are shorter than other store hours) but if for some reason their internet connection is down, I'm out of luck.

Yes, it's just an inconvenience, not a real hardship. It's not like I have to drive to Wyoming or something to pick it up. Yes, if I keep track of how much I have, I can plan to go to the store during pharmacy hours before I run out of decongestant. And if I can't get any today, I'm certainly not going to die before tomorrow. But it irritates me to have to schedule my day around a trip to the pharmacy, when I am NOT COOKING METH with the stuff. Thanks a lot, tweakers.

7 comments:

nicole said...

i know it! i tried to buy sudafed the other day and i ended up standing in line for FOREVER with some crazy lady that kept talking to me about hair products. then when i FINALLY got up to the counter to buy the stinking stuff, the pharmacist refused to believe that i was over eighteen. she got all snide with me, like i was some teenage drug addict looking to cook up some meth. i was not amused. (okay i realize this is a frighteningly long comment but hey, i had a story.)

Octavia said...

I didn't know you had to be over 18 to buy it. That's funny. They sell liquid Nyquil to anybody who wants it, and that has actual alcohol in it. And I think it's hilarious that you got carded trying to buy cold medicine.

nicole said...

i hear you're sharing my story with our fellow m.a.ers--i appreciate that. i do. (can you sense my subtle sarcastic tone?)

Octavia said...

Come on, you couldn't expect me to not share a story that's that funny. Plus it seemed relevant, because G. was having a conference with a student in a professor's office, and he made some joke about getting in trouble because he obviously wasn't the professor.

Anna B said...

i didn't know meth had to be cooked.

Octavia said...

Dude, if you take it raw, you'll totally get worms.

Heidi said...

LOL. You guys are hilarious. I miss the carrels. Of course, Tave, you're the only person on this blog who actually knows who I am and why I miss the carrels... Did you die without your pseudometh? :-D